“My husband and I have lost friends because of our financial problems. We see people around town; we’re still friends but not in the same way. It’s disappointing. I read an article on Emerson’s essay on self-reliance. It said the concept has ruined our society. We are all so self-reliant, and yet we need the networks of people, the sense of community and interdependence.”
—Gerri, 50 years old
We rely on work for everything from keeping our bank accounts robust to providing a sense of identity. Although my career in higher education broke down completely following my husband's death, I haven’t struggled to buy groceries or keep children properly clothed. My husband, however, took his life after a sudden, unexpected, completely unwelcome change in the career that constituted his life’s work. His professional role, carved out over a lifetime, defined him as a person and as a physician, and the loss plunged him into a state of overwhelming depression and panic from which he could not recover. So I know as well as anyone how devastating the loss of a job, of a career, can be. There are countless other catastrophes that cause a plunge in income and lifestyle and threaten the sense of self. We are all vulnerable to unwanted changes that upend our security and radically change our ability to care for ourselves and the people we love. Especially in this loss, with with its financial, emotional, and social consequences, friends can make a tangible, life-saving difference.
Click the cover to look inside.
An All-Weather Friend booklet
ISBN: 978-0-9825751-3-0
TrueWind Press ©2014
58 pages
Everyone knows unemployment is a tough situation. Strong friendships are more important than ever. But how can you really help someone navigate through this stressful time of life? What should you say (and not say)? Between Jobs has answers.
Learn the best ways to:
● Support your friend’s job search.
● Socialize in ways that are free (or low cost) and fun.
● Help your friend cope with uncertainly and worry.
● Encourage without criticizing.
Packed with strategies, suggestions and conversation guides, Between Jobs: Ten Ways to Help a Friend Who’s Unemployed outlines how to make the crisi more bearable. You can help in practical ways—without hurting a friend’s pride. But even more important, you can show real understanding when your friend feels discouraged. Joblessness won’t last. Gratefulness for your comfort and compassion will.
“Between Jobs clearly outlines effective strategies for helping people cope with the devastating financial and emotional consequences of unemployment. I recommend this book for friends and family members of people struggling to recover from the shock of job loss.”
To Purchase.
Between Jobs is only available through the All-Weather Friend website. Please submit the form below to inquire. We’ll contact you by email with a purchase link and shipping & tax information.
Available as a booklet ($5.95 + shipping) or PDF download ($3.50)
More Information
A. Martinez & Scott Horsley, “Families are Continuing to have to Deal with the Effects of Inflation,” NPR Radio, August 10, 2022
https://www.asinglemother.org, from Meghan, one of the website’s founders: “Our site helps struggling low-income single mothers with finding/locating the grants/programs they need. We have also tons of articles posted covering subjects like financial assistance, housing, childcare and paying bills.”
Neil Frizzell, “Can Money Really Ruin Friendships?” refinery29.com, February 19, 2020
Melinda Smith, Jeanne Segal, and Lawrence Robinson, “Job Loss and Unemployment Stress,” HelpGuide, April 2020
Lisa Rapaport, “Cancer Survivors Face Stress from Steep Medical Bills,” Reuters, January 21, 2019
“Medical financial hardship includes problems paying bills and other challenges with money; psychological stress like intense worry over unpaid bills; and behavioral issues like delaying needed care because of cost.”
Elizabeth Altman,“Divorce Can Cost You Over and Over,” CNBC, May 4, 2011
“Many couples are so focused on the obvious big-ticket items, they often forget about some of the smaller possessions they accumulated together in happier times. Things such as artwork, antiques, club memberships, season tickets and frequent flier miles are all considered marital property.”
Prudy Gourguechon, “The Psychology of Money: What You Need to Know to Have a (Relatively) Fearless Financial Life,” Forbes, February 25, 2019
“The most important emotions in relation to money are fear, guilt, shame and envy. It’s worth spending some effort to become aware of the emotions that are especially tied to money for you because, without awareness, they will tend to override rational thinking and drive your actions. What’s there to be afraid of? The possibilities are as varied as there are individual stories. But common fears include the fear of not having enough, the fear of looking stupid, the fear of provoking envy and the fear of being exposed or humiliated.”
Tami Kamin Meyer, “The Reasons More Older Americans Are Filing for Bankruptcy,” Forbes, November 16, 2017
“Medical debt is the No. 1 source of personal bankruptcy filings in the United States, and people 65 and older now make up roughly 8% of bankruptcy filers, up from 7% in 2008. . . .The recession ‘hit that demographic pretty bad.’ Moreover, in some states, creditors may garnish up to 25% of a debtor’s disposable net income monthly.”
Cindy Perman, “Running Out of Money. Cancer. Divorce. Many College Students Are Facing Serious Financial Crises,” CNBC, October 28, 2019
“The essay by Noelle Schon is an illustration that money problems, like cancer, don’t care if you’re young or old, rich or poor. She grew up in a family that was financially well off, and her parents set up a college fund so her education would be paid for. But then Noelle’s parents split up when she was a teenager and she says her family spent the next seven years in a state of financial crisis while her parents sorted it out. They moved four times and her father lost his job. Then, just as her mom was getting them financially back on track, a sick grandparent came to live with them. Noelle learned much sooner than other students how important money and a good economy are for the future — and that you have to prepare for what happens if both of those things fall apart.”